Fatalistic

3 hours ago, it was 1.30am, and I had a sudden craving for meepok from under my flat. I'm really growing fat these days.

Most of the time, I tend to be less than enthusiastic about doing my best, because I know that effort does not equates success, and most people are quick to judge by being result-oriented. Why work too hard and in the end not to be recognised? Perhaps that's why I don't find any motivation at the moment to sprint for exams. Kinda lost my fire. Even if I start hitting the books now, it's only cos I'm stressed at my peers already doing so.

I need to affirm my existence, but I don't wanna struggle doing so.

Sounds chim? Someone i know said something right: "The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn't being said." It is easier to obfuscate my cowardice behind words and philosophy, than to fight for something out of reach...